Found on an apartment door near christmas:
“We know how busy you are especially this time of year so let us treat you to a breakfast snack and beverage. Please make time to stop by and see your staff, friends and neighbors on Saturday December 23rd between 9am-Noon. We look forward to seeing you and have a safe and Happy Holiday.”
Is there a faster way to discredit yourself than to say you know someone is busy and then ask them to take time out of their day to talk with you?
Here is what I would have written:
“Dear residents, we know this is a busy time of year, so let us cook for you this Saturday. Come on by the office if you like between 9am and noon- we’ve prepared a healthy breakfast for you and your family and friends. Happy holidays!”
1. This recognizes that people are busy.
2. It provides real value
3. It will do better at engaging reciprocity because it does not say “Please make time.”
Oh, and everything you write is a sales letter.